Holidays are supposed to be about joy, family, and togetherness. So why are they always so stressful? Whether you’re traveling during the holiday season or not, there are a lot of potential stressors that can come up. It’s a good idea to be prepared for stress during the holidays so that you are ready to cope with them and enjoy the season anyway. Here are some tips for dealing with the unexpected and having a great holiday season.
Learn to Notice When You’re Feeling Stressed
We tend to get so used to stress around the holidays that we can end up not realizing how stressed we really are. Understanding the signs of stress and learning to recognize them in yourself will help you deal with the problem before it gets worse. When you’re stressed you might:
- Feel overwhelmed
- Become fatigued or lethargic
- Experience anxiety or dread
- Have physical symptoms like stomach issues, headaches, or chest pain
- Get sick more easily, due to a weak immune system
- Grind your teeth and clench your jaw
If you start to notice signs of stress, take a step back! There’s no reason for the holidays to compromise your health and well-being.
Leave Some Room in the Holiday Budget
It’s normal to want the best for your friends and family. Making a gift and holiday budget is smart, especially if you’re feeling the squeeze of inflation and you’re struggling to manage your finances. However, it’s very easy to overspend on the people you love, even if you do make a budget.
A good way to reduce financial stress around the holidays is to build a bit of breathing room into your holiday budget. Make sure that if you find the perfect gift, you’ll still have some money in the budget left over to cover it.
It can also be a good idea to make a budget for holiday gatherings. If you’re invited to a gathering, it might be appropriate to bring a dish, a bottle or a host gift, so make sure that’s part of your holiday financial plan. Grocery bills can really add up around the holidays, even if you’re not the one hosting!
Simplify Your Plans
It’s really common to overcommit during the holiday season. You might want to do tons of fun activities with your family or say yes to holiday party invitations out of obligation. However, it can be much less stressful to simplify your plans and set boundaries. Allison Forti, Ph.D., LCMHC, NCC, an Associate Teaching Professor and Associate Director of the Department of Counseling Online Programs at Wake Forest University recommends being very selective in what you say “yes” to:
“The holidays come with many invitations and expectations from family, friends, and
co-workers. Say no to everything unless you have a healthy reason to say yes. In other words, only say yes to things that are good for you. If you are rundown from all the holiday festivities, declining an invitation for another is okay. If you always leave your family gathering feeling small, belittled, and emotionally exhausted, it is okay to not attend, stay for a limited amount of time, or avoid the family members who drain you. Setting healthy boundaries can alleviate unnecessary stress and overwhelm.“
Don’t try to do too much. Choose a few favorite things and a few parties you want to attend. Don’t feel bad about saying “no” to the rest. A simpler holiday season will be less stressful and more enjoyable.
Take Care of Yourself
Taking care of yourself is very important, especially during the holidays. Get some fresh air and exercise regularly, get enough sleep, stay hydrated, and make sure you’re eating as healthfully as possible when you’re not celebrating. As notes Dr. Molly Ansari, an assistant professor in Bradley University’s online master’s of counseling program:
The holidays can be a busy time. We often find ourselves running around catching up on last-minute shopping, preparing for visitors, traveling and hosting. It can be so easy to let go of healthy habits during this time. It is easy to say ‘I’ll get in a workout after the holidays,’ or ‘I’ll take a nap another day,’ or ‘I don’t have time for myself.’ It is easy to eat unhealthy food as well. It is easy to snack throughout the day and eat all the lovely sweets that have been made. However, it is so important to maintain what keeps you healthy. It is these healthy habits that allow us to take care of ourselves and sustain our healthy selves during stressful times.
Don’t Let Your Compassion Stress You Out
During the holidays, it’s important to help those in need if you can. Lots of people struggle to get even the basic necessities, let alone the extras most people buy for the holidays. Being compassionate and helping when you can is fantastic, but it can easily lead to feeling guilty or sad, which can make you more anxious and stressed.
If you work closely with people who are struggling, you might even experience compassion fatigue. It’s important to remember that compassion is a good thing, but there’s only so much you can do. If you can donate or volunteer, great! But don’t let your compassion stress you out or keep you from enjoying your own life.
Make a Plan B for Holiday Travel
Traveling and spending time with family can be huge sources of stress around the holidays, especially when things don’t go according to plan. During the winter, weather and other factors can cause flight delays and cancellations, leading to disappointment and stress.
Anticipating this kind of stress doesn’t mean you should worry about it and cause yourself to feel worse. Instead, consider making a Plan B for holiday travel — think about what you can do at home to celebrate if you’re unable to make it to your destination. That way, everyone will be calmer in the days leading up to the trip.
Reframe Your Stress and Be Mindful
So much of the stress we feel during the holidays is due to personal overwhelm and societal expectations. It can be helpful to reframe your holiday stress by realizing that you have wonderful people in your life and you are choosing to put in the extra work and money into making the holiday enjoyable. Tom Kannon, DNP, PMHNP-BC, Assistant Dean of Online Graduate Nursing and Assistant Professor at Regis College comments about the impact of simply asking those around you for help:
Let’s change that perspective, let’s say you saw your neighbor, a friend, or a loved one who needed your help. Most people would want to help and would feel good about helping and might even feel bad if they found out someone needed help that they could give but weren’t aware. Don’t ever be afraid to ask for help with anything. There is always someone who is happy to be there in whatever capacity. Even if the person you ask can’t help you, they may know someone who can.
Mindfulness can also help you deal with stressors, so if you don’t already practice meditation or use breathing exercises in your daily life, now could be a good time to start. A lot can come up during the holidays to stress you out, but you don’t just have to power through. Stopping and taking a breath is sometimes the best thing you can do.
—
This post made possible by Andrew Deen.
Photo by Alisa Anton on Unsplash